The Butterfly Effect

pay attention to the little things

Happy Friday, beautiful souls.

Earlier this week one of my favorite humans on this planet who I was honored to work alongside for many years resigned.

Over the past several years we have shared countless conversations about our lives, our husbands, our children, our parents, our careers, the purpose of our lives, our calling, our fate, and so much more. She is very spiritual and lives by a deeply rooted moral code. The changing priorities of the government (our employer) really had her do some self reflection and consider what the job meant to her on many levels. She ultimately decided that the job no longer aligned with her values and left.

Photo by Joshua J. Cotten on Unsplash

As fate would have it, one of our colleagues—another amazingly beautiful soul who regularly restores my faith in humanity—referred her to a company his friend was working for. Unsurprisingly, this company realized what a gem of a human and potential employee they had on their hands and quickly hired her.

My point with all of this is we meet some of the greatest people in the most unexpected places. I believe that we have a path and people are put on our path for a reason. Not everyone is a positive influence or someone you wish to emulate. In fact, sometimes it’s the negative examples—the who-I-don’t-ever-want-to-be-likes—are more powerful than the positive ones.

But in this particular case, Amina is a positive influence. She is someone I want to be like. She is someone I thank my lucky stars and my God and the Universe for daily. She is selfless and beautiful. She is so beautiful it radiates in her eyes and her smile and her skin. She glows positivity. She is funny and kind and what is amazing is she wants the best for people and for humanity and that makes her even more beautiful. She is polite but not because she’s supposed to be, she’s polite because she is considerate. She never wants to hurt people. She is a voice for those without a voice. Anyone who has ever worked with her is instantly drawn to her. She brings a contagious energy to every meeting…even when it’s through a computer screen over Zoom.

She and I bonded a great deal during the pandemic. I had joined the team she was on not long before the shut down and was refreshed by her soul. She showed up to meetings ready to work, seemingly unfazed by the pandemic, and with a beautiful attitude. We both went through a lot since then and through it all she has been a guiding force in my life. She pushes me to be the best version of myself. She is an incredible wife and mother and daughter and community member and colleague. She cares about people and always shows up with gifts or sweets. She doesn’t ask how you need help, she just does it. We met at the Farmer’s Market on Tuesday after work and she chased Giovanni around smothering him in her pure love.

She has also been through a great deal in her life—and I’m not talking about she didn’t get into her top choice college, I mean she was born into a refugee camp and her parents left her for several years to forge a better life and came back for her and her siblings. And for the record, she did get into her top choice college. She is a hard worker and doesn’t let the negative things that have happened to her sour her. Maybe they have sweetened her because she is compassionate in a way few people can be.

I reference the butterfly effect in the title of this post because little things have big effects on our lives, sometimes much later down the line. A small decision, like me changing teams in 2019, allowed me to meet Amina and who knows the number of ways that influenced my life.

What I want to emphasize is we have to cherish the people in our lives. I know I am so lucky to have Amina. And, we may not realize it but we are Aminas in others’ lives. The little things we do for one another have big impacts. Wishing someone a happy birthday, showing up for a friend when they need you, checking in during a tough time in someone’s life…these things are what life is about. These are the things that make life worth living, that keep us going on a rainy day or rainy season.

I’ve heard that “people can’t change” but I beg to differ. Every day we wake up and can choose, I choose to smile, I choose to be kind. Maybe you need something a little more motivating…sign up to volunteer for an organization serving those in need, maybe you need the accountability. That’s great! I promise it will change you.

We can think before we speak. Unless you have a serious impulse control disorder, you can reflect on what you need to adjust in your life and implement that. But it’s so hard, you might say. And yes it is, I tell you, but who do we want to be? How do we want to be remembered? How do you want to live? When you put your head down on your pillow at night and reflect on the day, do you want to be happy with the love you exuded and the relationships your nurtured, or…

Happy Friday beautiful souls. I hope you have an Amina in your life. And I hope you can be an Amina for others.